There are countless films with the basic premise that sometimes, dead things don’t stay dead, and that’s a problem that someone has to deal with. In this film, the “someone” is the Rest In Peace Department, or R.I.P.D.
Continue reading “R.I.P.D. (2013) – Review”
Ray Breslin (Sylvester Stallone) wrote the book on breaking out of prisons. That’s not a metaphor, as almost every character in this film has read the book, and keeps a copy of it nearby for dramatic effect.
Ray makes his living by stress-testing maximum security prisons. Disguised as a convict, Ray is inserted into prisons so that he can break his way out, and then identify the security flaws. He’s broken out of every prison he’s ever been inside, and he’s confident in his abilities.
When a secret black-ops prison needs testing, they come to Ray. And they come prepared to pay a large amount of money for his services, particularly if he overlooks normal security procedures. As you might imagine, it turns out that this prison is both more secure and more evil than other prisons, and now he has to break out for real.
Continue reading “Escape Plan (2013) – Review”
Two thousand years after the fall of the Dark Lord, America still bears the scars of the conflict. Elves are the rich and powerful elite, living in secure, gated communities in the human cities. And orcs are the underclass – distrusted and feared, stereotyped (often accurately) as brutal gang members.
Ward (Will Smith) is the cop who’s unlucky enough to get partnered with the LAPD’s newest diversity hire: Jakoby, the first orc on the Force. Together, they have to deal with racism, corruption, and the constant threat of death. Also, someone might be trying to bring the Dark Lord back.
Continue reading “Bright (2017) – Review”
Mirrors are terrifying. They’re glimpses into a half-fake opposite world of doppelgängers and mimicry. Partly because of this, they’ve been a staple of horror films for forever, either as ways for killers to be seen, or things for monsters to come out of. Mirrors is one more film in the grand tradition of reflection-based horror.
Ben Carson (Kiefer Sutherland) is a burnt-out ex-cop who works as a security guard in a burnt-out department store. The ruined store is filled with mirrors – mirrors that were kept perfectly clean by the last guard, who disappeared mysteriously. Mirrors that act strangely, as though something inside wants to come out.
Continue reading “Mirrors (2008) – Review”
The title of this film is also the basic description of the problem – it follows. “It”, in this case, is a supernatural creature that stalks and kills people. It doesn’t run, and it isn’t fanged or clawed. It looks like a person – any given person, whoever it chooses – and it walks. Slowly, inexorably, it walks towards its chosen victim.
Victimhood is transferable through sex; a target who has sex with someone passes the monster on to that person. The film focuses on one primary character, Jay, and her attempts to escape the monster after having had it passed to her.
Continue reading “It Follows (2014) – Review”
The night before their high school reunion, a group of attractive people gather at a remote house. Tensions run high due to unfinished high school drama, wildly differing life paths, and everyone rediscovering old crushes. While this is going on, someone starts murdering them in ironic ways. Continue reading “Most Likely to Die (2015) – Review”
Unfriended is about a group of teenagers with a dark secret who are being hunted by a mysterious killer. Slowly, the truth about what really happened all those years ago is revealed, and at the same time characters are murdered one by one. It’s the standard slasher plotline, the same one that appears in Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer, and countless other films of variable quality.
To be fair though, Unfriended does attempt to break the mould and do something new(ish). This is not a normal slasher film; this is a modern, high-tech slasher for the digital age, for people with four different web-capable devices and a Google+ account. Continue reading “Unfriended (2014) – Review”